
If you were to base everything you know about Rupert on this photo alone, you'd think "what a wise, tranquil little GLC (God's Little Creature) he is. Just look at that calmness, that old-soulness. And it's true, sometimes he is tranquil. He's also got an incredibly soft head, which I love to smoosh my nose and mouth on. He's adorable. He's a gift. And right now he's driving me a little crazy.
Sometimes I look at Rupert, and his partner in crime and fellow demon seed Noah and wonder "What in God's name is going on in that head?" And they're such a little heads, though half the time they are more canny and on the ball than I'll ever be. The other half they're batting balls affixed to the top of a wires or biting their own tail, like that feels good. They're wrapping the pads of a lone paw around the tip of my nose, nibbling on my hair, lunging for squirrels through the window screen or rolling on to their bellies for a good rubdown, paws flopped over in "try to resist me" mode. In short, they're like four-legged seven year olds that shed. A lot.
I don't know if it's the warmer weather, but lately Rupert seems to be dealing with an overabundance of adrenaline. It's like all the thigns he usually does, he does faster and does more often. He is more snuggly, which is flippin' adorable, but he's also more verbal, in the 'haul your head off the pillow, it's 6 a.m." verbal variety. He reaches onto my plate - I know, I should not be eating in front of the TV, but I digress, or you do - when he's interested in my food, and runs right to a broken robin's egg I just brought home and tucked away, safely, I thought on the bookcase. The other day he started to scratch at my bedroom curtains, which is a first. I accept that my mattress is toast, but the curtains are off limits. If he sees me even begin to walk in the direction of the bathroom, he bolts past me like a kid trailing a fire engine. And the bathroom is where the real situation unfolds.
I'ce wondered about Rupert's thoughts, and come to the conclusion that they might go something like following: OhmygodOhmygodOhmygod, she's turned the tap on. Ohmygod. I will jump on the tub, then on the left side of the sink. I'll be in there in seconds. Crap, she's opening the cabinet door; I must duck. Now what? What the hell, she's putting me on the floor. Noah, too. I will repsosition myself right behind her. I am jumping back on the tub. I'm waiting. I'm back on the sink. She's saying something, which is stupid, because I can't understand her. I think she's kind of pi**ed off, but that never means anything. Crap, I'm on the floor again, this time with a little more vigour. I'm on the tub. I'm on the sink. I've just inserted my head under the little waterfall. Noah is waiting his turn, sink right. She's pulling me off and...saying
something. I am on the floor again, looking at her expectantly. I'm going to try again...
now! I'm back. She's exhausted, but perseveres. She's putting crap on her face...still applying crap...squinting and frowning, shaking her head...and she's done! She is pausing - and.... she gives in. We, Noah and msyelf, are triumphant. My head is all wet...my head is wet. The water is cold. The water is good. So good. Good and cold."
But I could be wrong. I'm not a mind reader.